Be careful who you hang out with
How much do you think our surroundings influence us? The answer is much more than we care to admit. We are social creatures living in hierarchical structures; we want to be accepted and liked by others to improve our status in the hierarchy. Achieving the acceptance of others will allow us to climb the ladder of hierarchy granting us access to power, resources, and much more.
Subconsciously or consciously, we are all affected by social norms, culture, taboos. From a broader perspective, the structure we live in starts to influence us from a very young age. That is why most parents are afraid for their children to have friends that are of poor influence. Any person is highly likely to be influenced by the group of people they surround themselves with, let alone a child.
I, for instance, started to smoke at the young age of 15, thinking that it was cool, courageous, and rebellious because, at the time, my friends were all smokers. To fit in, I also began smoking. The funny thing is nobody even forced me to start, but I felt the need to do so. I was the odd one out, and frankly, at that young age, just like many others, I also desired external approval. We all want to be the cool, popular, loved kid at school.
Bad influence does not necessarily have to be in such a concrete manner or even does not necessarily mean that the person who is doing it is evil. The person who harms you can be a good person at heart; however, they can also be very pessimistic, negative, and overall just an energy drainer. That does not mean they are an evil person. That does, however, mean that they have a bad effect on you.
I had a close group of friends with whom we played video games all day after playing hooky from school. For many years, we played video games, drank, smoked, and did nothing productive. We were all pretty happy with our friendship, or so it seemed. It was not until I decided to take up martial arts that my surroundings changed, and I realized just how much my group of friends was encouraging me to do nothing. As I said, they were not bad people, but they did not have any life goals at the time; they did not want to do anything other than waste time. We all did our part for one another in the cycle.
It is difficult to start a change in an environment that does not support you to do so. You may not require anyone to aid you to progress, but you can easily be demoralized by others and their negative talking if you constantly are exposed to them. The ironic part is such influence from our surroundings positively works just the same. If you surround yourself with good-willed, energetic, positive, and productive people, they will influence you to become such a person. Hyper successful people all have this trait in common; they do not keep people around them who are of poor influence.
If you want to change something in your life, start by analyzing your surroundings. Are the people around you supportive, and are they a good influence on you? Are they encouraging you to take the easy path, to not work for something? If you feel the people you spend most of your time with are not having a positive effect on you; if you realize that they encourage you to do nothing, they don’t push you to be a better version of yourself; maybe it’s time to start taking some action. Pick up new hobbies, make new friends, take up new habits. Sometimes even just isolating yourself for a while from negative people will help you realize the difference.
